on march 26th, my mom peacefully took her last breaths of air. my heart feels like it has been torn into millions of tiny pieces. to have this huge part of my heart now missing from my life is utterly overwhelming.

i made an emergency trip home to boston over a month ago when my mom entered a hospice residence. i wept with my family as we grasped the enormity of the catastrophe lying ahead. now that we're in it, i'm finding at times a certain comfort to share with others who have experienced a similar loss. as my friend sara put it, we're in a club together that a select few can understand. a club we would never ask to join.

my mom was the epicenter of our family. we stayed in orbit because of her. i'm worried about what might happen to us without her. as my brother wisely noted, she was a force of nature. how can we exist without that force?

what i will say from this experience so far, is that i have some of the most amazing, caring, loving, fantastic friends and family around me. i compare it to a meditation i learned a few months ago where one of the visualizations was to imagine yourself being lifted in the air on a fluffy cloud. my friends and family were and continue to be that cloud for me. i'm forever grateful to them, beyond words can convey.

soon i'll feel inspired to be in this space again, i'm still figuring out living day by day.

bisous,

alissa

mums and me at the getty center a couple of years ago.

i decided this weekend would be dedicated to food! i spent saturday going to two grocery stores with a friend, and rounded it out with a third store yesterday! but it was worth it to spend an afternoon making lots of healthy foods!

i had to share this red lentil soup recipe with you all because it is seriously delicious. i'm pretty happy for it to start a heavy rotation in my kitchen!what favorite foods do you love to make?

{images by me}

...

my favorite uncle loaned me his hasselblad a couple of years ago. i've be been so paralyzed with fear about shooting with it because i don't want to harm it in any way (for those of you who aren't photo nerds, this is a very expensive and gorgeous camera!).

so a few weeks ago i mentioned to a friend how i have this amazing camera sitting in my closet that i'm afraid to use! lucky for me he proposed a photo challenge, and low and behold it got me out to shoot a roll of film! the results were fairly mediocre, but here is one unexpected double exposure i thought i'd share with you. it is a combination of a sign i've always loved on la cienega, and the view from a hike along temescal canyon.

here's hoping we all find that spark of inspiration soon!{image by me}

i had an amazing trip to solvang with my girlfriends! it was so great to relax and laugh it up! tasting some nice wine was pretty fantastic, too!what have you been up to?

{images by me}

what do you have planned for your weekend? i'm excited for an annual trip to solvang with girlfriends!

the good things

1 :: having an amazing phone chat with my auntie!

2 :: anna finds the coolest things!

3 :: many cups of earl grey tea.

4 :: loving kate's beauty finds.

5 :: tuna melts and beers with seriously awesome buddies.

happy weekending, all!

{polaroid by anne bowerman}

you can buy prints, too! {images by dan mountford} {via design for mankind}

i've been contemplating what all to share with you since my unexpected departure. as someone who is a fairly private person in real life, i feel a constant struggle with what i share here in the land of the interwebs. but abandoning the blog for a few weeks sure could use a little explanation! until i find the words, i'll just say that i am eternally grateful to have such an amazing family and some seriously superstar friends!

so i spent a the majority of my h+r hiatus in boston where i'm happy to report i survived several snow storms, a bit of shoveling and some pretty cold temps! the snow and ice could be quite beautiful at times - despite the overall ick/stressful factor of driving in it. this past weekend i was back in los angeles thawing out and catching up with friends. in between such glamorous activities such as cleaning my apartment and laundry - i made some peanut butter cups to share with my valentines! for those of you interested, you can find the recipe here. next time i'll be sure to put more chocolate in the bottom of the cup to give it more stability! happy valentine's day, friends!

bisous,

alissa

{images by me}

as a little aside, i've got some big stuff going on in life these days.  posting could be a little sporadic (you may have noticed!) but i'm trying to create the best balance as possible so i can continue sharing with you! the 'ole blog may change a bit over the next few months - so stay tuned!

now onto the fun stuff!

a fantastic saturday hike up temescal canyon! 

i spent a fantastic monday in santa monica with friends.  little mara was pretty excited to ride the carousel!  the weather was perfect for spending a little time in the park nearby!

what were you up to? 

{images by me}

nevertheless i managed to be fairly productive!  made some thank you cards for a friend, spent sunday morning at a mission in downtown l.a. to help feed the homeless, mixed up chocolate chip cookie dough and spent the day with sweet mara!

what were you up to? {images by me}